by Ethan Cesena
As an adult adoptee, returning to Chongqing wasn’t just another trip—it was a journey back to the place where my story began.
For years, China existed only through adoption papers, old photographs, and unanswered questions. I had imagined what it would feel like to return, but nothing could have prepared me for actually standing in the city where I was born.
One of the most meaningful moments of my trip was finding my finding spot. After years of only seeing it written on official paperwork, I was finally standing there. It was just an ordinary place to everyone else, but to me, it marked the beginning of my story. The emotions hit me all at once. I couldn’t stop thinking about the little boy who had once been left there, the impossible decisions that had been made, and how that single place changed the course of my life forever. It was heartbreaking, overwhelming, and strangely peaceful all at the same time.
Another moment I’ll never forget was meeting my foster siblings for the first time. They were no longer just names connected to my adoption—they were real people, standing in front of me with smiles, hugs, and tears. Even though we had spent most of our lives apart, there was an instant connection that didn’t need many words.
One of my favorite memories was sharing dinner with my foster family. We gathered around the table, shared food, laughed together, and simply enjoyed being in each other’s company. It was a moment I never thought I’d have. Sitting there, I couldn’t help but wonder what life might have looked like if our paths had never separated. While we can’t change the past, I will always be grateful that our paths crossed again.
I was also incredibly thankful to experience this journey alongside friends who supported me through every step. They celebrated the joyful moments with me, stood beside me during the emotional ones, and reminded me that I didn’t have to carry this journey alone. Some of my favorite memories of China aren’t just the places I visited—they’re the people I shared them with.
Returning to China didn’t answer every question I’ve carried throughout my life. I still don’t know every chapter of my story, and maybe I never will. But Chongqing gave me something I had been searching for all these years. It gave me connection. It gave me memories. It gave me a deeper understanding of where I came from.
I left China as a baby with no memories of my beginning.
I returned as a man with memories I’ll carry for the rest of my life.
A piece of my heart will always remain in Chongqing—not because it answered every question, but because it reminded me that my story started there. And after all these years, I finally had the chance to walk the streets where my life began, reconnect with the people who were part of my earliest days, and find a little more of myself along the way.
Explore The Park’s Rooted Route Tours and take the trip of a lifetime! Our next tour closes on July 26th!
